what happens when reality hits you in the face? the reality that you never wanted to accept since you were a kid. one that you never thought would actually happen. when you thought everything was finally going okay, and little things just come up and shatters that little dream you had going on where everything was just fine. you're not fighting it, but others are and you see them doing it.. for you.. it sucks to know that im just so helpless and yet, discontented with things.
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right now, i feel like questioning God all over again, and prolly even blaming him for things such as these. but, its not right. its been 4 months now, and i guess all i can really do is thank Him for His unfailing love, grace and mercy. He has blessed me with very close friends who has held me up throughout this journey. one that i never thought i had to go through.
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its really silly to just break down cos of a small incident but, it really did hit me hard in the face. guess its not that small after all and they're prolly doing it just out of compulsion and i guess its showing. but it really hurts, it sucks. i wished things were better off than before and now. i honestly dont know why im going through all this stuff. i wished i knew. i want to know. i want everything back. the four of us.
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God, please reveal Your plans. i know i said im gonna trust You and have faith but, im breaking apart again. im too weak and i need Your strength. its happening all over again. i dont know. i really dont know. i just know i NEED YOU. everything's too blurry for me to comprehend.
6 comments:
as the song goes...
God is too wise to be mistaken.
God is too good to be unkind.
So when you don’t understand,
when you don’t see His plan,
When you can’t trace His hand,
trust His heart.
everything will be all right, sare. :) i love you!
i appreciate it lots, girl.
thanks a bunch! much love :)
hey gurl, i might know whats going on, but just hang on aight? it would soon make sense.
love ya.
ur bro,
-ken.c
hey kor.
yea, im really waiting and wanting it to make sense. sigh. i'll hang on, i will. *hugs* :)
hey satay! wow it's been a long time since youth concert when we last had a proper talk!
it's good to come to God in humility and i believe you have done just that hey =] look at where the situation is in light of eternity.. and just maybe, it won't seem so bad anymore? i pray that through all this, it'll only cause you to pursue God even more.
keep going for God! thanks for sharing sarah. always encouraged by how transparent you are on your blog. =]
yea am trying to look on the brighter side of things but sometimes, i tend to be in denial that such stuff are happening kinda thing.
but well, i guess through times like these, its only appropriate to fully rely on God though its realllllly hard. sigh.
but thanks babe. :) and we'll catch up soon!
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